Creating a Warm and Welcoming Community: The Inspiring Story of Jenny and Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire’s Gay Women's Group

Retired civil servant, Jenny, has lived on her own for many years and began to wonder whether she was going to feel lonely for the rest of her life. She had plenty of friends, but as an older gay woman there was never a group that she felt that she completely fit in with. She wasn’t looking for a partner, just companionship and community in older age.

“I thought that it cannot be just me that feels like this, there must be other people. So I decided to reach out to a few organisations to see if we could get something going. I was starting to feel pretty stumped until I got in touch with Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire” said Jenny.

“In the 60’s and 70’s it was impossible for gay women to come out. It wasn’t talked about or understood, you were vilified and humiliated. So, I needed to work with an organisation who I felt protected with and wouldn’t make me seem foolish and that didn’t happen with Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire - I was welcomed with open arms.”

Here at Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire, we have a Social Inclusion and Wellbeing team that run a wide range of initiatives to help older people stay physically and socially active.

“They asked me what it is I would like and I said that I needed some help with advertising, as I wanted to stay anonymous and didn’t want my face all over social media. We also needed to get the wording and the location right in order to encourage people to come together to form a friendship group or community. To my utter amazement 15 people turned up on the first day and from that time on, it has been wonderful.”

The Gay Women’s Group now takes place every other Wednesday at the Malvern Cube Café from 11am until 1pm. It has already had a lasting impact on many of its members as they have started to organise social activities away from the group.

“As someone that admits that they hate phones and computers, I had some help to set up a WhatsApp group for everyone. People now use it to set up additional meet ups to the pub, for coffee or more recently, to watch the Women’s World Cup Football Final and it has started to expand into a community.”

“There are still people trickling in, but we need to keep up the momentum and keep promoting the group, as older gay women may still be nervous about coming out and joining us due to past experiences. It is important for people to know that there is somebody there for them if they are feeling lonely and a group that they can identify with, where they can really be themselves and feel at ease.”

Jenny and Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire have big aspirations for the group’s future and where we hope to take it in future.

“As you get older your life does change, but that desire for friendship and companionship never changes. Nobody wants to be alone with no one to talk to. What I hope for myself and for the group is to create long-lasting friendships so that people can really get to know and support each other, and I feel that it’s happening here.”

“In future, I would like to see more groups pop up across the county and throughout the UK. It is an opportunity for people like me to come forward and tell Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire what they need so that they can support you.”

If you are looking for help with setting up an LGBTQ+ group, then we at Age UK Herefordshire and Worcestershire want to hear how we can help. You can get in touch with the Social Inclusion and Wellbeing Team by calling our referral hub on 0800 008 6077 or emailing referralhub@ageukhw.org.uk.