Still Got It: Breaking the Taboo on Sex After 50

As Valentine’s Day approaches, Age UK Norwich has announced that it is supporting an important national initiative called Still Got It to promote the release of Age UK’s first ever guide focused on sex, relationships and intimacy.

This comes as the Charity recognises a current lack of information and resources around the subject tailored to this age group, with Age UK’s latest research revealing one quarter of over 50s wish more information about sex in later life was available.

Age UK Norwich also hopes this new publication will help transform attitudes to ageing in Norwich and Norfolk and challenge the stigma that exists around this subject, by getting people to talk more about sex, relationships and intimacy as we get older.

Sex & intimacy:

Age UK’s research highlights that, despite three in five (59%) over 50s believing that a healthy sex life is important for a relationship at this age, 10 million (39%) feel uncomfortable discussing this.

Nearly half (47%) of over 50s feel that advertisers and brands ignore the sexual needs of people in their age bracket. This societal stigma has serious knock-on effects on how people in mid and later life are understood and accommodated for, even in healthcare settings. The research reveals that:

• 5 million (19%) over 50s think their sexual health needs are overlooked by their doctor or other medical professionals
• 1 million (15%) over 50s would be too embarrassed to go for an STI (sexually transmitted infection) test
• 9 million (15%) over 50s worry about their sexual health and wellbeing

Dan Skipper, Chief Executive Officer at Age UK Norwich, says: “This national initiative is so important because we’ve seen first-hand in Norwich how relationships formed later in life can flourish into something truly special, including marriage. That’s why we’re so pleased to be part of it, helping to spread this important message and signpost people to the new Age UK guide.”

The Still Got It initiative is supported by a range of credible experts, including TV presenter and dating expert, Anna Williamson, sex and relationship author and columnist, Tracey Cox, behavioural psychologist, Jo Hemmings, and doctor and author, Dr Miriam Stoppard*.

Relationships and connections:

As Valentine’s Day draws closer, dating, relationships, love and self-love become hot topics and while, for some over 50s, the day passes like any other, for others, it’s action-packed.

Age UK’s research reveals that for 3.3 million (12%) over 50s, their ideal Valentine’s Day consist of getting intimate with their partner, and for 1.2 million (4%), it includes trying something new in the bedroom like a new sex position, toy or lingerie. The day is due to be equally busy for 940,000 over 50s, whose ideal Valentine’s Day includes getting back out there to look for a new connection, believing it’s never too late.

When asked how they would look for a relationship, sex or intimacy for themselves or a friend, 11 million (42%) over 50s would hope to do this the traditional way – by meeting someone while out and about. Furthermore:

• 7 million (37%) over 50s said they would join groups or clubs. This could include our most popular Over 50s Night held at Mr Postles Apothecary or one of our coffee clubs.
• 1 million (15%) over 50s would go on a singles holiday
• 7 million (10%) over 50s would reconnect with an old flame

Michelle Collins, acclaimed actress and TV soap star, says: “As we get older, the world becomes more obsessed with our age than who we really are. But we’re exactly the same person on the inside as we’ve always been – maybe we even know ourselves better now.

“That’s why I’m so proud to support Age UK’s Still Got It initiative. As someone who found love in her 50s, I’m keen to raise awareness of the stigma that’s out there around older people and sex and relationships and promote the need for more information and advice on this subject like the Charity’s new guide. It’s so important to continue embracing every part of ourselves in later life, including our sexual and romantic needs and desires – and that starts by talking about it.”

Of course, the landscape of finding love has changed a lot in recent years, with two-thirds (64%) of over 50s saying the new world of dating and apps would leave them feeling overwhelmed. Many also admit to not feeling confident in their knowledge of certain topics like erectile dysfunction (36%), STIs (31%), the menopause (28%) and the link between sex and intimacy and mental health (38%).

The new Age UK Guide is all about empowerment through information, helping those over 50 feel as though they can discuss sex, relationships, love, dating and intimacy openly and without fear of judgement or shame. Age UK Norwich believes this will, in turn, help ensure people in this age group don’t feel forced to shut down this part of themselves if that’s not what they want, but instead are well-informed enough and encouraged to lead the mid and later life they want to live.