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I'm feeling lonely
Feeling lonely occasionally is normal, and it often passes on its own. But sometimes it doesn't – and if it's starting to have more of an impact on your day-to-day life, we're here to help.
Why am I feeling lonely?
There are all sorts of reasons you might be feeling lonely. You might not even be able to put your finger on a specific reason – sometimes, it can just hit you unexpectedly. Whatever the situation, there are things you can try that might help.
You might be feeling lonely if something's changed:
- your daily routine: it can be hard to adjust to less socialising and structure in your week after retiring, for instance
- a relationship: it might be that you or a loved one has moved house, a relationship has come to an end, or someone you care about has died
- your health: health conditions can stop you from doing some of the things you used to
- your confidence: for whatever reason, you might feel less able to get out and about and do the things you enjoy.
It isn't the same as being alone
You can feel lonely even if you're not alone. Plenty of us feel this way even when our lives might look quite busy from the outside – and even when we're surrounded by others. Similarly, lots of us enjoy having time to ourselves. That doesn't necessarily mean that we're feeling lonely.
What matters is that the amount and type of social contact you have works for you.
How can I feel less lonely?
There are lots of things you could try that have helped other people feel less lonely. Making changes can feel daunting, especially if you're feeling low – but deciding to make an active change can help you feel more positive and in control.
You could:
- try a new activity, revisit an old hobby or join a club
- find a local support group
- explore online activities like games or social media
- look for a volunteering opportunity
- get in touch with Age UK for help and support.
Find out more about things you could try that might help you feel better
“Planning things really helps. It makes you feel like there's something important in your life again."
How can I look after myself?
Loneliness can have a significant impact on wellbeing. It can lead to you feeling low or out of sorts – or just struggling to work up the energy to do anything. It can be easy to slip into not taking care of yourself as well as you normally would when you're feeling this way.
Here are some things that can keep you feeling physically and mentally well:
- If you can, getting out of the house can help break up the day.
- A bit of exercise, even just a walk to the shops, can really boost your mood – especially if you can spend a bit of time in green space.
- Eating and drinking healthily can help you feel well in yourself. If it's difficult to find the motivation to cook, you could look up a new recipe you'd like to try or see if there's a cooking class in your area.
- Some people notice they drink more alcohol when they're feeling down. Keep an eye on the units – and get support from an organisation like Drinkaware if you need it.
Want more information?
We're here to help
We offer support through our free advice line on 0800 678 1602. Lines are open 8am-7pm, 365 days a year. We also have specialist advisers at over 120 local Age UKs.